


Remembering To Forget

by TheRosesAreWilting



Category: Andy Biersack - Fandom, Black Veil Brides, Love - Fandom, Pierce the Veil, Warped Tour - Fandom, tony perry - Fandom
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-28
Updated: 2014-11-07
Packaged: 2018-02-10 20:20:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2038776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRosesAreWilting/pseuds/TheRosesAreWilting
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From a young age Sara-Elizabeth knew her big brother was destined for greatness. That meant he would have to leave her to rot alone in their miserable hometown, and she didn't mind as long as he was happy. But after her first heart break, there was a strain on their relationship because he couldn't be there to help her through it.<br/>Her brother's band is a huge success while she sulks around her lonely apartment barely leaving to communicate with old friends. In her mind music is the only thing she needs, but when Andy makes a surprise visit, only to discover what an antisocial state she has been in for the longest time, he decides to take her on Warped Tour hoping to strengthen the bond between them that had begun wearing thin after one of his most regretted mistakes. Along the way she meets her celebrity crush and as fate would have it he begins falling for her. But her wounds haven't finished healing yet, she wants to forget all the scars but her heart wont let her. Sara knows she must learn to trust again before the best thing to ever happen to her since high school walks away...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

Sara Elizabeth Biersack: I sat on my bed remembering when Andy got his first guitar. He would stay in his bed room for hours with the door closed teaching himself all the chords and frets, singing the acoustic of every song he knew. Whenever I had asked to watch him he would just lock his door and say, 'This is my me time.', so instead I'd just sit outside the door and listened as he dissapeared into his own little world. There were several occasions when I fell asleep on the floor and woke up in his bed, sometimes he was there watching me and other times he wasn't and that was the main reason we were so close. As he got more comfortable with his guitar skills he'd let me into his room for nap time, he was like my own personal lullaby. When I was in fith grade and he was starting his first year of high school however, girls always found their way outside his window even though he was the outcast most of the time. I hated it so much, and their squealing made me want to throw a rocks at every single one of their faces because they wouldn't just shut up and listen. Eventually it got to the point where I couldn't sleep at all so I'd just stare out the window flipping off all those hormonal teenage girls who wouldn't leave my big brother alone. They would look at me in disgust and envy as I stuck my tongue out at them and set next to Andy, it amazed me that he never noticed he had his own set of groupies following him around after school, it probably didn't help much that he looked like a model. Those were probably my favorite childhood memories, but then Andy wanted to pursue an acting career. It was going great for a while and he'd tell me over the phone or in letters how much more interesting L.A. was than our shitty little town and that he was less of an outcast over there. I remember one day he called home overly excited and when I asked why he told me it was because he landed himself two parts one in a Cingular commercial and the other in a commercial about drugs or something like that. When they finally aired I sat in awe staring at the television set, Andy was just on TV! Our parents ran out of money to pay for the acting school, but the teachers still wanted him to stay so he ended up getting to stay on a scholarship until the school got a new principal. He ended up having to come home because they wanted payment and we couldn't afford it. He got back home and he was behind in his classes and everything, he went into an antisocial state where he barely came out of his room and if i ever needed to talk to him I would have to go into his room and bother him. The high school ended up putting him in special classes because they gave up on him, although I could never figure out why because he was one of the smartest people I knew, and he just dropped out school altogether. I was dissapointed in him at first but then I remembered his guitar and singing and knew he was going to have an amazing band, and he did. After a small garage band he played with he ended up forming Black Veil Brides and all the preps laughed at him because of the makeup they wore, how they dressed, and the type of music he sung. I didn't get the short end of the ridicule though, I lost alot of friends but some stayed by my side for which I was grateful, most of the town thought his band was going to go down into the shit hole and they couldn't have been more wrong. He ended up moving away again for the band and I knew it was for the best. My first boy friend was in seventh grade. I thought he was amazing and perfect for me at the time, and he was. We lasted until junior year when I found out he cheated on me with the town skank Maranda. I was so heart broken that not even my mom could cheer me up, I just wanted Andy to hold me while I cried and kick Jackson's ass even though I had already done it myself. I found myself calling Andy only to be sent to voicemail and that killed me even more because I felt like my own brother didn't want anything to do with me. My dad tried to reassure me that Andy was probably just really busy, but he never called me back. I ended up turning into the antisocial mess I am today because of it all and I know you might say a nineteen year old girl should be out there partying, and having fun with her amazingly successful brother and his band mates, but things haven't been the same between us since then. I still love him and everything but I'm also still hurt, I hardly ever leave my apartment unless it's for work or shopping for the essentials needed for my survival. The friends I that I still have after trying to push them all away try to get me to mingle with other people but I won't tolerate it and I probably look slightly trashy because I haven't cut my hair since eighth grade, so it's pretty long and too much to deal with, and it's usually in a messy bun. Jackson keeps trying to get back with me and I he hasn't had a girlfriend since I broke up with him, or at least that's what he wants me to think, but I refuse to even answer his calls let alone give him another chance. I think I might spend the rest of my life in this shit town, being antisocial while my big brother is too busy living the good life not giving a single solitary fuck about the little girl he left behind. But I don't even care because I have my music and that's all I need, spending the rest of my life imaging being married to Tony Perry doesn't sound so bad. Because who needs friends when you have band members that don't even know you exist....right?


	2. Dreaming

*The next morning*  
I rolled over and snuggled further into my blankets, didn't really feel like getting out of bed today...then again when did I ever? Just as I was drifting back into my dreamless sleep All Time Low's Therapy began playing, I groaned as I reached over to grab my phone off one of the empty pillows next to me and answered it.

"Hello Sara," oh no it was my mom on the other end, "are you up yet?"

"Yes mother I've been awake for a few hours now.", I lied trying to rub the sleep out of my eyes with my free hand.

"Then why didn't you answer earlier when I called?"

"Because I was in the shower a-"

"So why didn't you call me back when you got out?"

"Mom I got distracted is there anything else you would like to know? Is that the only reason you called me?", I was getting irritated by her constant worrying and questioning.

"Okay dear, and yes I just wanted to make sure you're alright,",she had gone quiet for a minute, "there's something else but I guess it can be a surprise." She sounded way to excited about this "surprise" and I wasn't liking it.

"And when do I get this surprise you're oh so excited about?"

"Whenever it decides to get here and you've wanted it for the longest.", I heard some mumbling in the background, "Dear, I would love to stay and chat but your father's rushing me off the phone, he's taking me out to eat soon. I'll talk to you later Elizabeth, we love you very much. Bye!"

"What I've wanted for a while was for people to leave me alone and let me deteriorate into nothing.", I mumbled to myself while I curled into a ball and closed my eyes. I felt a sudden weight at the foot of my bed and assuming it was my cat Belle I let sleep pull me under. I had a dream this time around, I never usually have dreams but when I do they're quite strange and make me question my mental stability. This dream was different...

~Dream~

I sat on the couch waiting for something, although I didn't know what, I just knew I was waiting. I stared at a clock above the tv until it hit 8:00 then I got up and walked out the front door. As soon as I stepped outside I could tell something was wrong, I looked down at the phone in my hands (although I don't remember it being there a second ago) and dialed the first number that came to mind: mom. The phone rang until it finally went to voicemail so I called my dad but the same thing happened. I began to get slightly panicky, I called every number in my phone and no one answered not even Andy, but I kinda expected that. It was then that I finally noticed how empty the streets ere...I was all alone. I ran to each of my neighbors apartments, knocking on the doors only to discover they were all unlocked. I ran to the park a few blocks away as the sky turned over cast and the wind began to pick up and making the already dirty streets dirtier.

When I reached the park I saw three people and it was killing me because they were the last three people I wanted to see, Maranda, Jackson, and Andy, out of the three Maranda was the first to see me. Her lips curled into a smirk as she held Jackson by his cheeks and kissed his lips, I couldn't watch anymore. I walked over to my brother and touched his shoulder ready to start crying, he turned around, stared at me silently for a few minutes before walking away. I sunk down to my knees in disbelief, tears were streaming and I couldn't control it, "Andy come back...please don't leave me again. I need you here...you're my big brother...I can't do this alone anymore!" But he continued to walk away my sobs were loud and it was getting harder to breath.

"Oh shut the fuck up and quit being such a little bitch. It's your fault no one wants you around.", Maranda sneered leaning into Jackson. I cried even harder not wanting to be here anymore and I would probably suffocate myself by not breathing enough air, essentially choking on my own tears. They just laughed at me and walked off, it was getting to be too much...

~End of dream~

I jolted awake seeing my pillow was soaked with tears, I wiped my eyes trying to calm down, but I remembered my dream and I cried harder. Of course I wanted to be left alone but I don't want anyone to leave me, and when Andy walked away without even a reason I lost it, I was still currently losing it, I couldn't even see properly much less get out of bed. I felt a pair of arms slide around me and I leaned into the chest of whoever they belonged to and cried while they rubbed my back trying to calm me down. "Shhhh, it's ok my little Elie. I'm right here, everything's gonna be okay.", the arms and chest belonged to a guy I could tell by his voice. But I knew the voice so well, the one that left me all alone yet I found it so soothing and only one person ever called me Elie. I scooched onto Andy's lap and curled into a ball, crying the last of my tears before falling back to sleep this time without the terrible dream.


	3. Chapter 2

I vaguely remember what had happened before I fell back to sleep as I turned over to my side to stare at the bathroom door. I had fallen asleep in Andy's arms...but that's impossible because he's touring with his band. I sighed and slowly got out if bed and walked into the bathroom, I had to pee really bad. By the time I was finished using the bathroom and cleaning up I had decided it was all just a dream, a dream that felt too close to reality, Andy's career was way more important than his depressed little sister that he forgot about years ago. Wow that was a harsh way to think about my self.

I sauntered over to the refrigerator and looked for something to drink, it was practically empty but the drinks that were in there didn't look like very thirst quenching so I settled for a glass of tap water and resolved to go shopping later. I reached up into the cupboard and grabbed one of my many plastic cups and filled it with ice and water. I stood with my back against the counter staring off into space while taking small sips of my water. It was quite peaceful living on my own. There was no curfew, no one to make sure I got out of bed everyday, and best all no nagging! But I will admit it did get a little lonely sometimes, maybe a pet will fix that.

I must have been pretty wrapped up in deciding what kind of pet to get because I didn't notice the tall figure standing next to me until I felt a hand on my shoulder. "Aaaaahhhh!", I screamed throwing my cup which still had water in it at who ever it was. I ran to the stove and grabbed a knife from the block of knives and turned around guarding myself. It took a second for me to realize it was just a scared shirtless Andy. "Andy?", I probably looked as shocked as he did, if not more, although it was for different reasons.

When he finally got over the shock of me throwing ice cold water at him stepped forward and spoke. "Well thanks for the wonderful welcome home gift."

"W-what? Andy?"

"The one and only."

"B-but...the band..."

"What about it?'

"How did y-you get into my a-apartment?"

"Maybe you shouldn't bury your extra key in the dirt of the potted plant outside your door. That was too easy to find...then again I do know you better than a robber would.", he was smiling now and I could tell he was enjoying my silent disbelief.

"Next time just fucking knock like a normal person.", I finally got out without stuttering. He laughed at my annoyance, I started walking around the kitchen counter towards my couch when he grabbed me by my shoulders pulling me closer to him and gave me a boogie, "Awe come on Little Elie don't be such a stick in the mud."

"I'm not little and I'm not a stick in the mud. And don't ever do that to me again!", I said pushing him away, all the anger and annoyance I had bottled up towards him from the past few years came out clear in my voice. I sat on the couch and changed the channel to Food Network, Everyday Italian was on it had to be my favorite show on this channel. Andy sat at the end of the couch sensing my obvious frustration, I could see him from the corner of my eyes looking at me. I don't think he noticed though because he was too busy opening and closing his mouth like he was trying to say something but he couldn't quite get it out and I had a good idea of what it was about.

"Go ahead ask me.", my sudden remark must have surprised him.

"Ask you what?"

"Ask me what my dream was about. I can tell you want to know what happened. You know you're terrible at hiding it contray to your belief." He sat there a few moments longer as if he was mustering up the courage to say it.

"What...what was your dream about?"

"I dreamt Iwas alone...completely alone.", I answered after a moment of silence in which I was deciding how much of my dream I was actually willing to tll him. I croaaed my arms over my chest and stared blankly at the wall behind the television as I waited for his reaction.

" Is that all? That can't be all...you were crying and yelling my name Eli. What else was going on?"

I rolled my eyes and sighed not bothering to hide my annoyance, "What does it matter Andy?"

"I want to know beacuse I care, that's why it matters.", he argued his voice filled with exasperation, "I want to know how it made you feel."

I was down to my last straw with his persistence. I got off the couch and wallked over to stand in front of my brother really looking at him for the first time in years. He looked so mature, his haircut, his lack of eyeliner and warpaint, and he was even wearing an outfit hat wasn't ripped. And I realized how much he's grown since he left me behind and forgot about me, I almost forgot he was always too busy to pay attentioon to me. I mentally shook myself and realized he was still goin on about my dream. I pit one hand on my hip and the other on my forhead.

" You know what Andy, do you really want to know what else happened and how it made me feel?" I could feel my voice getting louder. To mask the tears that I could feel threatening to spill out of my eyes, I turned to anger it was my safest option at that moment. "You left me! You walked right out of my life with no explanation. No goodbye. You. Just. Left. No matter how much I called you, you kept walking, acted like I didn't even exist! As for how it made me feel? Not much different than how I feel every second I'm awake! That nightmare is already reality Andy...my reality! Do you wanna know how, huh?", he looked like he was about to get up and try to comfort me, "No Andy sit right there and don't you dare try to touch me! Beacuse you left me, you ignored me, you forgot about me. You promised you woldn't, everyday I feel alone...because I thought my big brother loved me...but he left and it was like I never had one in the first place.", I let the last part out as barely above a whisper.

Without waiting for a response I ran down the hall into my room closing the door behind me. Tears streaming down my face, I slid down onto the floor with my back to the door trying to silence my sobs. All the crying that I held in for all those years finally came out, I sat there trying to calm down for a few minutes until I felt stable enough to walk to my bed and lie back down. I let silent tears fall onto my pillow as I drifted back into, what I hoped was a peaceful, dreamless sleep. Because you can only act strong for so long.


End file.
